Fine. Here’s a BSG finale review.
Superbowl Suckass. How’s that?
Watched it with several friends, all of us excited as only nerds can be. The show had raised a whole gaggle of questions during its four seasons, and the most important ones had been left for the finale to answer.
SPOILERS AHEAD (though the finale did a far better job of spoiling the show than I ever could)
So how do they do it? God. It’s all god.
Why did that one lady come back from the dead? Don’t sweat it, it’s angels or something.
Who were those people that only a few others could see, who had been guiding events since the very first episode? Angels, maybe, don’t worry about it.
Where does the remnants of the human race? ANOTHER EARTH.
What happens to the bad guys? Oh, here’s a ridiculous deus ex machina to take care of that in a single stroke, OFF SCREEN.
Why was All Along the Watchtower featured throughout the show? Never even touched on.
And let’s have the 40,000 remaining members of the human race all decide, TOGETHER, to give up all their space ships and modern technology and TOILETS and LIVING WITH A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD for being spread out over the entirety of the earth to live (and breed) with cavemen. Cavemen, people.
Oh, and let’s end the show with a “beat you over the head until I can see your brain meat” ending, yeah, solid. And let’s show some video of robots in our world, oooh, spooky parallels, because there’s robots in BSG, too!!!!
Never have I been so disappointed in a show’s finale. Never has a show I was sure would find itself on my “all-time favorites” list so quickly fall to “show I would warn people away from” list.
Yes, I have lists. I like lists. I hate BSG.
Grade: F
